On Sunday I was enlightened, you might say, on the source of my singleness...Apparently it's because I choose not to wear makeup.
A dear, sweet (married) sister in our ward felt it her responsiblilty to inform us single sisters of just what we are doing wrong. I would like to dwell a moment on the two erroneous ideas she shared with us (if you want more and haven't read Marges' blog you might enjoy it).
#1: "if you're going to be a naturalist, you'd better be miiiiighty beautiful."
#2: "you girls who think a man is going to love you whether you wear makeup or not are fooling yourselves"
To this I say BAH!
Mom is famous for saying to us girls from time to time "even an old barn looks better with a fresh coat of paint" -- her idea of a fresh coat of paint consisted primarily of making sure her lipstick was on straight before we got to church on Sunday. I can live with that. (Over the years-all 31 of them-I've realized there are those out there who truly appreciate the old barn for its rustic natural beauty.)
Ironically, I have two beautiful sisters who somehow managed to find wonderful spouse wearing little or no makeup. The mind reels...I've never been accused of being "as plain as an old mud fence" or being "hit by the ugly stick." But alas, there is no hope for makeup-less girls like me. Once again, to this I say BAH!
I've never been so tempted to stand up and say "Lady, you're crazy" or to just walk out...after all there was an adorable tuxedo cat outside the church that I would have much rather spent my hour with.
If only Lorelai Gilmore had been around to say "You've exhausted all of your talking rights by being crazy." Then she would have carefully escorted the offender to her chair.
an eclectic smattering of the comings and goings of a vivacious, stunning, elegant, beautiful, witty, amazing, talented, brilliant, glamorous, distinguished, fabulous, pesky, cute, trendy, magnanimous and most recently--INDOMITABLE, 30-something-year-old woman as she explores the many splendored things offered by a very strange world.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
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Recent Ruminations (and those not so recent)
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Fun ways to waste your time...
- Amazing Magic Gopher
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- American Memory (Library of Congress)
- Chronicling America (Library of Congress)
- Etsy
- Grand Ole Opry
- Kidz World
- Mr. Picassohead
- Page by Page Books
- Panda Cam (National Zoo, Washington, DC)
- Star Wars Shop
- United States Holocaust Memorial Museum
- Volcano Cam (Mount St. Helens, Washington)
- Wordles
4 comments:
LOL. The only thing that kept me there was the sidebar comments you were making ("1950-what?"). Miss prim and proper finally gets rascally during a Church meeting!
ooooh I have been WAITING for this post!! Well said. Well said!
Well, as a random passerby, I am impressed by the fact that you’re writing skills and humor has out-surpassed those of A.A. Milne (what to abstract for you?), I have decided to grade your blog…
Blog Report
Spelling …. A
Format …. A
Grammar …. A
Wit ….. A
Reference to moms’ “barn” …. A
Smart enough to be single at 31 …. A
That gives you the final score of D- !
How you ask? To which I strongly suggest, STOP BEING FUNNIER THEN ME….. I would have added a few curse words but you used the word “church” in your blog and I don’t want to go to Hell or something
I was alway advised, after I got divorced, that I would never "catch another husband" if I didn't dress better. (I didn't realize husbands were like the flu.) Apparently my haggared single mom look was terribly male repelling. I guess it was a good thing my husband was bald so he couldn't gripe too much about my disgusting appearance. (Thanks for lying and saying I'm beautiful though.)
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